I was born over 300 years ago in a fire from the union of two unholy demons named Vinegar and Preposition. I was bitten by Abraham Lincoln during a full moon, and now every four score and seven years I transform in a Werebraham myself. Since that time, I have dedicated myself and my life to truthfulness, and never ever lie or exaggerate for comedic effect, personal profit, or to sow confusion. Also, I’m madly in love with you.
Those are pictures of me. This is my family, my partner Kelly Hogaboom and my kids Nels & Phoenix.
Here are more pictures of what I begat.